An Essay On Storm Hawks
by Xekstrin
Summary: A collection of rambling, ill-organized thoughts about the Storm Hawks universe and characters.
1. Chapter 1

-1An Essay On Storm Hawks

_This is exactly what it sounds like- a collection of essays on various topics that interest me. I'm going to do my best to be unbiased when I dissect the characters, geography, and science of the world of Atmos. Let's start with the most interesting topic- The Storm Hawks themselves, and Starling._

_And yeah, THIS is what I've been doing instead of working on The Limit. _

**Aerrow.**

He's dynamic at first glance, a bit boring as a concept, but thought-provoking when you take him apart. He's the paper cut-out hero for the paper cut-out villains, with a strong leader voice, the ability to do anything he sets his mind to, and a strong sense of right VS wrong. He's patient, caring, and even if he doesn't always understand what's wrong he'll always try to fix it, and is loyal to a fault. Aerrow's strength lies in his natural talent as a Sky Knight and never-ending drive to finish what his ancestors started.

This last comment brings me to the most interesting part of Aerrow himself, which is the reason for his starting the Storm Hawks in the first place. The show is very vague, but after squeezing a few answers out of Ace himself and listening carefully to the new opener, there's definitely something supernatural going on with Aerrow. Aerrow was _chosen _to be the new leader? By whom, exactly? Why does Ace say that the Oracle makes a return trip eventually, in the official interview most of you have probably already read/listened to? Aerrow, in his first fight with Carver, wins by a lucky shot. This is probably his first battle, so even though he has speed and strength Carver wins through sheer experience. Then we have the destiny-altering moment when Aerrow uses the Lightning Claw for the first time... the part that stands out the most to me is Piper's expression when he leaps into the air, and he knocks Carver out with one blow.

She does look a bit frightened, no?

This is a side of Aerrow that's slowly emerging as the show goes on. He may not have the necessary know-how, but he and Radarr are incredibly resourceful. Their strength lies in flexibility, the ability to adapt their plan as the situation changes, and in a fight it can change in a matter of seconds. Knowing their gear inside and out certainly doesn't hurt. More and more he's proving to be practically unstoppable, and as his team grows with him they certainly are going to be a force to be reckoned with in the very near future.

Aerrow's weakness is that he's still only fourteen years old. Physically he looks closer to sixteen (I was surprised to learn his real age, but then again I know a thirteen year old who's six feet tall so it's not impossible) and even though he's mature for his age he has lapses. Aerrow is an orphan and in charge of three other orphans (I left Stork out for a reason; he's an adult). He has to make sure they're fed, clothed, and reasonably healthy and happy. This is a priority to him, one that conflicts with what I'm going to call his Supernatural Responsibility, or his "destiny" to save the Atmos and defeat Cyclonia like he was "chosen" to do. He wants to have fun and be with his friends, like most normal teenagers do. Even though they're in the middle of a war, these kids find a way to make some semblance of normality and stability in their very confusing and turbulent world, and Aerrow is the focus that they all hinge upon. He may not be the oldest, but he's the only one with this Supernatural Responsibility and that changes him, makes him more receptive to being the leader and taking charge of a situation. This stress on a normal fourteen year old would probably crumple him, but even if Aerrow is the leader he has a great team to help share the burden, even if none of them really recognize what they're doing yet. His team is another strength, and one I'm going to focus in on right now.

**Piper.**

In charge of navigations, tactics, crystals, and keeping everyone clean, Piper doesn't have Aerrow's Supernatural Responsibility but makes up for it in natural responsibility. In the Episode "Forbidden City", only she and Aerrow manage to land the correct way when the floor falls out beneath them. Everyone else comically crumples to the floor **(Junko: At least I landed on something squishy!) **It's a small thing, but nevertheless a hint as to them being a little bit above their team mates.

As the only girl on the ship I believe she's taken on the Mother role, as well as older sister. I'm saying older sister only in a psychological sense since we don't know who is older than whom, because Ace only said that "they're all around fourteen years old… except for Stork who's around twenty". She feels the need to be in control all the time, because she's learned that when left to their own devices, Aerrow, Finn, Junko, and Stork are all sadly lacking in the home ec. department.

Even though they all try to be normal in their own way, I feel that Piper is the focus of the love and nurturing on the ship. She and Aerrow make it ordered and provide discipline and focus. They're the ones who take it from being a group of mercenaries fighting for the side of good and make them a family, or as close to a family as these orphans have. (However, one must note that Junko is the one who probably provides the most open affection for everyone.) She's meticulous and careful, probably set up as a defense against the chaos that most likely runs rampant in their world. Aerrow's always so great at everything he never bothers to make a plan, but that doesn't run well for the rest of the guys, so Piper makes plans for them whether they like it or not. Piper is the oil that keeps the big strong gears running smoothly. Without her there to nag, they rust, they break, they fall apart, and worst of all is that they don't even know why.

I feel Piper isn't fully appreciated for the job she does, but that runs the same for Stork. Again, I'll get to him later. Now we're focusing on Piper.

Piper is amazingly talented, but not the way Aerrow is. Aerrow has his supernatural boost, but Piper is just plain genius. Her official profile on the Storm Hawk's website says she speaks more than five language fluently, is a black belt in the Storm Hawk's Universe version of Kung Fu (amusingly called Sky Fu) and is of course a master at the crystal sciences, a field considered difficult at best. What's more, she's self-taught, as she reveals to Lark in Episode Six, "Best Friends Forever".

**Lark: Well, where are your books?**

**Piper: I don't really have any. (shrugs)**

**Lark: You mean… you taught yourself all of this?**

And of course since we then find out that "Lark" is actually Master Cyclonis in disguise, this comment holds more weight. Cyclonis is _the_ leading expert at controlling, designing, constructing, and utilizing crystals. Period. The fact that self-centered Cyclonis admires Piper as an equal says a _lot_.

Piper's weakness lies in her impatience, her frustration at her hard work not always being recognized, and having only limited resources. She could improve vastly with some proper tutoring (even if she might resent being told what to do) and maybe a real female role model besides Starling, who's never around. Piper is a girly girl at times, a teacher's pet who wants to be praised, admired, and respected. She has moments of depression, of wanting more than life on the run from Cyclonians and constantly ducking their way out of danger. The thrill of it is great, she feels, but she knows that this can't last forever. In the episode "Forbidden City", she asks the Oracle what she's supposed to do with her life, suggesting insecurity in being where she is right now. She knows there's something better out there, waiting... or at least, she hopes there is. She fumbles along pretty well on her own, but guidance is something she craves, and a straight and narrow path with no surprises, where everything is nice and ordered.

**Finn.**

Ahh... Finn.

Finn, Finn, Finn... Where do I start? He's immature, block-headed, horny, selfish, seems to be impaired from ever thinking of long-term consequences, way too confident in his own mediocre abilities, and emotionally retarded. In other words, he's a perfectly normal fourteen year old boy, and that's what sets him apart from the other Storm Hawks. He has no Supernatural Responsibility, no special skills (besides being a crack-shot with the crossbow), and doesn't even really want to be a good guy. I get the distinct feeling he's only along for the ride. Aerrow and Piper decided one day they were going to be heroes and since they just couldn't leave Finn behind they decided to let him tag along. He wants to be respected and admired, like Piper, but he doesn't have the drive to do the work necessary for that. He wants to be strong and talented, like Aerrow, but has no Supernatural Responsibility and again no dedication to practicing any sort of fighting technique. He's lazy but brings a lot of normality to the ship, since everyone has to deal with his average problems and his real-world mentality, "lets NOT be a hero and go have fun and stay in one piece!'. Like a lot of fourteen year old boys, he's also obsessed with sex. The only problem is, the type of girl who would be best for him (say, a smart and mature girl who can take care of him... like Piper...) are the types of girls he just doesn't understand.

His weakness is that he's just so normal, he doesn't stand a chance against the supernatural or above average problems the rest of the crew have to deal with. He crumples under pressure (he goes crazy if he so much as skips lunch, as Piper so dutifully pointed out in episode seven) and can't handle new problems the way Aerrow so effortlessly does. He also seems to get eaten by wild animals a lot. And his ride gets trashed a lot. Actually, everything bad that could ever happen seems to happen to Finn for no reason at all.

His strength is that he keeps everyone grounded, a reminder of how things are supposed to be, instead of always fighting the Cyclonians. He's also pretty witty, and it takes smarts to be witty. He might not be book-smart like Piper or Stork, or tech-smart like Junko, but he can be perceptive of a situation if only enough to make fun of it and draw attention away from his own flaws.

And yet in the episode "King For A Day", we finally see some growth on his part. He realizes that he has to get over himself long enough to help the people of Vapos, and then he goes back to being his normal wise-cracking self, but in future episodes you do notice a difference. He seems to still be growing as time goes by, and only time will tell what the finished product will be. Personally, I have hope for him. I think he'll eventually learn through trial and error how to be a better person, to be a little more selfless, and become a great man.

**Stork.**

My personal favorite. Stork is a Merb, a seemingly amphibian humanoid creature that's excessively paranoid. Terra Merb (land of the Merbs) is a place of constant destruction, random storms, and rampant diseases. Thus, all Merbs are constantly on alert for any sort of danger. This makes Stork very useful as a team mate, but his warnings are often misheard because the times he's actually right about danger are far less common than the times he's concerned about spontaneously combusting. Stork is an interesting character because despite his obsessive paranoia, he's the pilot of a rusty old bucket of a ship that's constantly crashing. His companions are four reckless teenagers who face death on a daily basis. Yet he stays because the _Condor _is the only place he feels secure, despite the danger. In the episode "Age of Heroes, Part I":

**Aerrow: So we're not official, but I'm still a Sky Knight, you're still my squadron, and we're all still friends, right?**

**Stork: Oh? I'm only with you until something better comes along.**

Though he appeared to say this in total seriousness, he was probably being sarcastic- NOT, I must note, because he actually is friends with them, but because he knows there will never be another place like the _Condor_. She's an old ship, but she's reliable to him, and no one can fly her like he does. I truly think he's in love with the _Condor_.

Out of all the characters, Stork is remarkable because he's the one who grows the most, despite being the oldest member of the group. In the beginning of the series he never left the _Condor _except for emergencies or if he was dragged out; by the time of the episode "Forbidden City" he willingly leaves the Condor and designs his own personal skimmer-like ride, the Storkmobile. He goes out on missions with the rest, and his confidence skyrockets. He's still growing as a character, like Finn, but more obviously so.

Stork's strength is that when everything is at its worst (even though he is the one generally needing protection) he stands up tall and saves the day. He can be relied on in the moments of extreme danger (everything is exploding and we're all about to die), but not always so on the more mundane matters such as being nice to you at the dinner table. He's also a whiz with technology, even managing to put together a fully-functional motorcycle out of spare parts in under two seconds flat. (Episode four, "The Code").

He's bipolar in just about every sense of the word, and most disturbing is the fact that even though he does his best to avoid danger at all costs, when in a dangerous situation the risks just seem to... _excite _him.

**Stork: Phew! That could have ended worse. (slow, sickeningly pleased smile as he considers the alternatives) Much, much worse…**

Stork is the most unstable member of the group and an obvious outsider despite the other's attempts to include him. If it weren't for the fact that he seems to have grown a bit fond of the other characters as well as being obsessed about the _Condor_, he'd be prime villain material.

**Piper: Cyclonia… just as ugly below.**

**Stork: Eh. It does have a certain… Dark charm. I wonder how they decorate the dungeons? **

**Piper: This place is really giving me the creeps!**

**Stork: I think it's kinda homey!**

**Junko.**

My second favorite male character, Junko is too adorable for words. He is the gentle giant of the group and the one with the least complications, but he is far from 'normal'. Junko is a Wallop, a race of humanoid rhino-people who inhabit Terra Wallop. Though we haven't met any other Wallop characters in the show (besides a deranged dentist), from what we've learned on the episode "Tranquility Now" is that most wallops are big and mean and stupid. Even though Junko might not be all that quick on his toes, he's proved to be anything but mean and is "intellectual" ("Storm Warning" sees him reading a book in his spare time). Even when Finn is callous to him ("Calling all Domos" and "Absolute Power") Junko takes it all in stride. He doesn't hold grudges, he's always quick to forgive, and expresses more affection to the rest of the group than anyone else combined. He's generous with hugs and I-Love-Yous, probably glad to find that humans are more receptive to the gentler emotions than other Wallops, who treat him badly because of his "weak" personality.

Despite this, Junko isn't afraid to use violence when necessary, though he does prefer to talk things out he's not one to shy away from ripping a door open or smashing a few buildings.

Junko's strength is his strength, of course.

Something interesting: In the episode "Tranquility Now" Junko loses his Knuckle Busters, but when he's wearing the fake ones he says they're even stronger than the real ones. Could this mean the Knuckle Busters are actually a method of controlling Junko's insane strength? His Aunt Eunice might have lied to him, you know.** But what about Finn? **you say. **He went all strong when he wore them**. Yes, but that's because there might be a _fixed strength _to the Knuckle Busters, and for a moment Finn was at Knuckle Buster Level Strength and that was too much for him to control. But this level of _fixed strength _is actually less than what Junko can do _on his own_, but since it's _fixed _he can't go beyond that, because they're designed to be only a certain amount of strong. When Junko was young he didn't use his natural strength at all; he tapped into the power of the Knuckle Busters, which made him feel more comfortable with using his own strength. But since he didn't know about the limitations of the Knuckle Busters, he figured that without them he was nothing, when it was actually quite the opposite.

Let's go DBZ for a moment. Let's say that normal humans, like Finn, have a power level of two. Normal wallops have a power level of five. Anyone wearing the Knuckle Busters automatically has a power level of six, but cannot go any further than six. Junko's power level is seven (or maybe six-and-a-half), but since he's wearing the Busters half the time, and the Busters _cannot go beyond six_, he then has a fixed power level of six. Thus, when he was young and refused to use his own strength (or rather he didn't believe he _had_ any strength, due to psychological trauma caused by bullying) his Aunt Eunice gave him the Busters. The Busters had inherent Power Level Six abilities, which is greater than most wallops, thus causing Junko to become "a whole 'nother wallop." and giving him a confidence boost, to boot.

Humans- Two.

Normal Wallops- Five.

People Wearing Busters- Six (AND NO MORE THAN SIX!!)

Junko- Around seven.

Since he says that without the busters, his strength is TOO POWERFUL to control, we're going to assume that Junko's normal power level (meaning, without busters) is higher than a normal wallop but not terribly so, since this whole "TOO POWERFUL" thing was just his head messing with him while under the affects of being zapped by a crystal.

His weakness is... is... well it used to be his denial of his own strength, but I suppose now his only weakness is being gullible and easy to persuade. With fast-talking Finn and rational Piper around to protect him, though, I wouldn't worry too much about Junko.

**Starling.**

Starling is something of an enigma since she doesn't get as much screen time as the Storm Hawks do. Ace says she's around Stork's age, so I'm going to assume when the other Interceptors died she was probably around the same age as the Storm Hawks are now.

Starling is a cool customer, always ready with the right answer and very much the only adult figure the Storm Hawks have in their life (Stork doesn't really count since he doesn't provide much guidance and is probably more around eighteen years old, while Starling probably is around her mid twenties already, and an experienced veteran soldier). She's also a bit distant, afraid of making new friends because of her early loss.

Starling's strength is her know-how, and her unbreakable spirit. She's the future the Storm Hawks have, I believe, if they stick on the path they are on now. Sharp, smart, and in-control, Starling doesn't let anything get in her way.

However, she's also one of the most damaged and fragile characters. Her tough exterior is a necessity; when you suffer the way she has, the only options are to break or to melt and reform into something stronger. She doesn't let people get too close to her, but the Storm Hawks are slowly melting her frozen exterior.

And.. not much else to say, unless you want to count theories. I have a theory about Starling and the reptiles of Bogaton, that she used to be friends with them and something happened with the Interceptors and the Raptors. That's why in "Age of Heroes part II" she shows up with a bit of technology that uses the same golden energy that the Raptors use. The Terradons and her must still be pretty close...

_And now we move on to the Cyclonians._

**Master Cylonis.**

My favorite female lead, because even though she falls into several Bad Guy stereotypes it's the things that aren't explicitly stated about her that make her all the more fascinating: her level of power at such a young age, her history as Cyclonis, the male voice that sometimes accompanies her own for no particular reason other than to emphasize a point, and her ability with crystals. Cyclonis is another cool customer, but she's more sarcastic and biting than Starling is. Out of all the main characters she gets the least screen time. She appears in "Age of Heroes" parts one and two, for maybe a minute in "Tranquility Now", and most notably for the entirety of the episode "Best Friends Forever." But after that all the way up until the yet-to-be-aired episode 27, she shows up not at all, except in passing mention and a statue raised to her in the Talon Academy, and in two brief hallucinations in episodes "Forbidden City" and "Siren's Song" to Aerrow and Piper respectively.

Speaking of which I can't write an essay about Cyclonis without mentioning her odd relationship with Piper. Just about every Storm Hawks fan is clamoring about the notorious episode six, "Best Friends Forever", which is one of the most blatantly lesbian-leaning episodes I've seen in an anime or cartoon that wasn't already blatantly lesbian. (Even the mud wrestle scene between Terra and Raven from "Teen Titans" was them basically fighting over Beast Boy and the love of the team). The tension in that scene where they're alone together in Piper's room was really shocking to me considering this is a kid's show. Up until then we'd seen moments with Piper and other girls- winking at them, whisking them away from the playboy Finn a little bit more forcefully than prudently necessary- but in this episode if you pay attention to their expressions (and the Storm Hawks animation style is beautifully detailed in every facial expression they create, with fluid eyebrows and expressive mouth and eyes that shift to fit the scene) Piper just can't seem to keep her admiring eyes off of "Lark". Or her hands, for that matter. They hold hands two times on screen that we can see. Piper has her arms around Lark's waist when they're riding in the heliscooter together, even though in episode three "Gale Force Winds" when Dove is riding with Piper (and during much more dangerous conditions with the wind blowing and enemies firing on them, etc, where it would be normal for you to want to latch on to somebody, right?) Dove seems to be keeping her place on the seat just fine without even sitting close to Piper.

What the?

And then Lark reveals herself to be Cyclonis- I would have actually have been surprised if I hadn't already read a summary of the episode. The disguise really WAS perfect, even if the creators lead you to believe that Lark just might be some random villain there to thwart them and not Cyclonis herself. Piper by this point already has her suspicions… yet she still says nothing until the very last moment, maybe not wanting to believe this girl she just met could be…I could go on and on about the things that might have happened off-screen and my theories about Cyclonis and sexuality, but let's just return to the subject of Cyclonis as a whole.

Cyclonis's strength lies in the fact that she is an empress with vast resources at her disposal. Besides Wren in episode three, she's the only other character who can manipulate a crystal without a medium (such as a weapon to equip it to), and notably she's the _only_ one who's _ever_ done anything like making a crystal act contrary to its own undeniable nature (although Arygyn in "The Lesson" seems to be able to drain them of their power). The purple striker crystal in her staff temporarily changes color and morphs into a frost crystal in episode two "Age of Heroes, part II". The blue striker crystal in Finn's crossbow bolt freezes in midair when she holds her hand out to it. It also changes color to a foreboding blood red before dematerializing and exploding outwards with enough force to knock Junko off his feet. Cyclonis's knowledge of crystals, therefore, goes far beyond the norm. She seems to have such an intimate relationship with them that she prefers them to people, as we've seen in a few episodes she's always diligently at work creating a new crystal in her lab. In my fan fiction "The Limit" I've likened this relationship to crystals with Stork's relationship to the _Condor_ and Aerrow's ability to do… well… just about anything he wants.

Cyclonis's weakness is the incompetence of her subordinates and a short temper that leads her to do stupid things when the Storm Hawks are involved. She's also quite mad, in my opinion, or at least unbalanced, and might even be possessed by some unknown spirit. This would explain the ghostly male undertone and the reason for a young girl to want to take over the world, and to have the powers she has. It would also explain her sadness at not being normal enough to "hang out" with Piper.

**The Dark Ace (at the risk of being bashed by every fan girl, ever).**

I believe that the Dark Ace is one of the finest characters in the Storm Hawks universe… off-screen, through inference, and in past tense. On-screen and currently he's a bumbling, short-tempered, snarling, mean-spirited, sometimes stupid, insanely vengeful man with a yen for small boys.

But then again maybe that's just me.

Look at the Sky Knights we have seen so far- all of them fight on their rides. The only exception to this rule is the red-headed leader of the previous Storm Hawks, and the Dark Ace. You'll notice not even Aerrow fights on the wings of his ride until he gets the idea from the Dark Ace, who probably spent years perfecting that technique after he learned it from his former leader. That says a lot about him. He pioneered a brand new fighting technique, for God's sake. He never lost a battle until Aerrow came along with his Supernatural Responsibility. Because Aerrow is just so talented he learned in a few hours what took the Dark Ace half his life. And that, my friends, is why the Dark Ace is now a shadow of the man he used to be.

His strength still lies in the fact that he uses an unorthodox fighting style, but now Aerrow has taken that style and uses it better than he ever did (when was the last time you saw the Dark Ace hopping from wing to wing to wing to wing like Aerrow does in episode six?). The Dark Ace uses it when he can; Aerrow uses it almost all the time. Of course Aerrow has the benefit of having a co-pilot to always be there and catch him when he's free-falling. That does say something about the Dark Ace's skill, again. He has no co-pilot, so the fact that he jumps back onto his ride says a lot. His weakness is that he's passing the prime of his life and Aerrow is slowly but surely taking his place as the finest dogfighter out there. Also, he has a short fuse. He blows his top and he loses it.

**Snipe**

There's not a lot to say about Snipe because he's tear-inducingly one-dimensional. He's a strong, stupid man who likes to smash things. Nothing more, nothing less.

**Ravess**

Snipe's sister isn't much better. She's a calculating _belle dame sans merci _who plays the violin. The one thing I like about her is that she brings her own theme music to battle. That reminds me of the old war time when they would bring drummers and pipers to the battle to cheer on the soldiers. She brings a violinist. She also has very little patience for anything less than perfection.

**Repton and the Raptors**

Repton is different because he's a pirate, not an actual Cyclonian. He's merciless to his enemies, tends to lose his cool, and is a savage in about every sense of the word though he tries to pretend otherwise. He's also stubborn and independent, and is mean to everyone friends and foe alike. But unfortunately he has the habit of being a kiss-up to Cyclonis and the Colonel, who prove themselves to be his superior. He's a bully only slightly less one-dimensional than Snipe, and that's because he has three younger brothers he needs to take care of because his mother made him promise not to kill them.

**The Colonel**

I love the way those _r's_ just roll off his tongue. The Colonel is amazing because he's not evil, just self-serving, and because everyone- _everyone_- is afraid of him, but we don't know exactly why other than the obvious he's a giant mega-gangster spider-man with razor sharp teeth and a belly for anything conceivably edible. I could see him and Cyclonis having tea together as people with mutual interests who feel it prudent to keep an eye on each other to see if they are a threat. Or perhaps The Colonel invited her over as an honest-to-goodness guest, because he does seem to enjoy entertaining people as is seen in episodes "Thunder Run" where he feeds Junko and "Dude, Where's My Condor?" when he takes over the _Condor_ and makes it his own private party ship. If I could make an episode for Storm Hawks, I would have an episode partially focused on the bad guys, just for the opportunity to see Cyclonis and The Colonel interacting. That has the potential to be fascinating/hilarious, like…

**Colonel: Ah, Cyclonis, _mi corazon, preciosa bonita de mi alma! _What a pleasure it is to have you here for dinner. Truly I have waited for the day when I could host such an esteemed person as yourself.**

**Cyclonis: To refuse an invitation from the Colonel himself wouldn't be in my best interests.**

**Colonel: Ahahhaaha, no need to be so formal, my pet. **

And so on… it would be only partially focused on the bad guys cause that would get boring after a while, and I needs me some Stork/Piper.

The Colonel could be very dangerous, but I get the feeling he wouldn't really do harm to the Storm Hawks or wants them out of his way like Cyclonis does. He just likes to see people scurry around to do his bidding because he used to be extremely violent and now his reputation proceeds him enough so that he doesn't need to be violent at all. Just the threat is enough. And that smug bastard loves every second of it. That's what makes him awesome.

**The Murk Raiders**

They're all shameless imitations. In my opinion the creators totally phailed. Because they delved so deep into their bag of clichés already there was nothing left but pirates. Oh well. They seem like a hybrid of the pirates of the Caribbean and the reavers from Firefly/Serenity. The interesting thing about them is they seem primarily composed of shrimpy little Merbs with fierce attitudes, when we've already established that "typical" Merbs are like the one you see in every episode- Stork, who's lanky and paranoid. They redeem themselves from their overwhelming cliché-ness by being alarmingly metro sexual. They are only good to keep around "_for the lulz."_

_Did I miss anyone…?_

_ARYGYN!! Oh my god, of course, how could I forget Arygyn?_

**Arygyn the Skeelur (WARNING! BIASED OPINIONS AHEAD!)**

Though I have no idea where they got that name from, it works. Even if it sounds a bit like _rulleeks nigera _when pronounced backwards. (ever since I found out Zartacla is Alcatraz backwards I've been poring through every name to find more hidden funniness.)

Arygyn is perhaps the funniest character to pop up thus far, besides Stork, whom he shares a voice actor with. This is the most completely biased entry in this essay, because I LOVE Arygyn and I want everyone to know it. He's such a flaming queen. At first glance I was like, "wat." but as time went on in the episode I started cackling like a mad woman when he would keep on infuriating the Storm Hawks with his inane training style.

But besides that, Arygyn is another enigma. He might just be a Gary-Stu in disguise- he certainly fits all the qualities, right down to the overt flirtatiousness with Aerrow. He might be the only ugly Gary-Stu in existence (sorry Arygyn, but you have wrinkles and a big nose and an annoying voice). He's said to have trained all of the greatest Sky Knights to roam the skies, so in all likelihood he trained Aerrow's ancestor, the one we see in the opener. He's capable of doing everything and not breaking a sweat, as well as being a known descendant of Chuck Norris, Indiana Jones, The Joker, and the previous Master Cyclonis, making him the current Cyclonis's brother. It is a sad thing that his line will most likely not be continued due to the fact that he likes to have butt sex with other men.


	2. Chapter 2

This is when we focus in on a certain characteristic of the Storm Hawks, specifically, the pairings.

NOTE: If you think a pairing is hot just for what you think it is, that's fine by me. I'm the same way with Cyclonis/Repton though they have almost no interaction on the show. I'm not saying these pairings are wrong and shouldn't be written in fanfiction, I'm just… well lets be honest, I'm pulling half of this out of my ass because I can.

_Overtly biased opinions in italics._

**-Essay on Relationships-**

**:Aerrow:**

**Aerrow and Relationships**: As I've mentioned before, Aerrow is incapable of being totally normal as things are going in the show. He has his Supernatural Responsibility taking up fifty percent of his thoughts; the well-being of his family is forty five percent, defeating the Dark Ace due to personal ambition and not just because he's a Cylconian is another two percent and his own happiness and sanity ranks in at an outstanding three percent, which is more than most Paper Cut-Out heroes. Romantic relationships, if they're to last any long amount of time, have to have some effort on both of the partner's accounts. Aerrow seems a bit too attached to his family to become enamored with some random stranger, so the most logical pairings for him would be within the Storm Hawks themselves, as they're always on the move and can't stay in any place long enough to become attached to anyone else and want to stay with them always. (Though this does bring up the idea of a long-distance relationship sustained through letters, perhaps. I don't know if the Storm Hawks universe has a post system, or maybe internet connection acquired from the Time Pulse?)

The concept of sitting back and letting the war take its own course with no aid from the Storm Hawks is impossible due to his Supernatural Responsibility, so no beautiful Mary Sue is going to convince him to stay with her and forget about the rest of the Storm Hawks. If Aerrow did manage to fall for someone outside the Storm Hawks, this person would have to get along famously with the rest of the Storm Hawks before they could get close to Aerrow. He's not so focused on girls and probably doesn't think about them as much as Finn does. But if Aerrow can't find a solid relationship, that doesn't mean he can't have a few flings here and there to test the waters, so we have a basis for pairings that don't necessarily involve romantic love, though Aerrow is of course a Paper Cut-Out hero and wouldn't heartlessly sleep with a girl and move on. I'm saying he might try out a few things, when he has free time on Neon or Tropica. An innocent kiss, some flirtation… or maybe he's too awkward for that. He's only fourteen after all, not all fourteen year old boys have gotten over the "girls have cooties" stage.

**Aerrow and Sexuality: **I get an innocent vibe from him. He probably wouldn't respond well to being come-on to, by anyone. He'd probably feel awkward and want to avoid the situation.

Aerrow as he's portrayed on the show is a red-blooded male (who might possibly have more-than-friendly affection for Piper) so the idea of him being homosexual is highly unlikely. He's a Paper Cut-Out hero, so he'll fall into stereotype and go for a girl. However, he's also pretty open-minded and might not be adverse to experimenting with another curious boy- Junko, perhaps. Then again, we have his stubbornness to deal with, and if his ideals say that boys and boys don't mix, you're going to have a hell of a time trying to pair him up with someone. He might not care if someone he knows is gay (he's a fair person with a strong sense of justice, remember) but he himself won't turn around in the blink of an eye. _Of course, this won't ever happen in the show because Cartoon Network doesn't have the grapefruit. _

So with Aerrow we have the possibility of Non Sexuality, because of his devotion to his Supernatural Responsibility and the well-being of his family, Heterosexuality to reinforce his typical Good Guy background, and Homosexuality because he's open-minded.

**The Aerrow Pairings:**

**DA/Aerrow** is based entirely on their rival relationship, despite the fact that DA killed Aerrow's predecessor (possibly his father) and that Aerrow is only fourteen while the DA is nearing his thirties. While I understand the reasoning behind them being obsessed with one another to the point where they begin to admire each other, or they're obsessed with each other **because **they admire each other, you've just got to admit that the moment these two clap eyes on each other they go into a frenzy of rage, and all of Aerrow's other responsibilities get thrown out the window in favor of beating the Dark Ace into a pulp (he seems to get off on it, really). After all's said and done and they go home after another battle, I could see Aerrow relishing his victory and maybe having an odd sexual satisfaction from once again coming out dominant over an adult male fighter, and the Dark Ace simply obsessing over what could make a boy so powerful (though he's more likely to resent this fact than start secretly worshipping Aerrow). But any soft feelings they might EVER have are wiped clean when they see each other again and the blood lust takes over them.

**Piper/Aerrow** is based on years of interaction both on-screen and off. They have a very special relationship, I've noticed. It could be construed as romantic, it could be a brother-sister thing, but whatever it is Aerrow is strongly protective of her and she's dependant on him for patience (something she tends to run out on when dealing with the other guys). And there's an obvious unspoken thing going on between them. Whether or not they see each other only as brother and sister is uncertain, but out of all the Aerrow pairings this one is the most likely through the facts that they know each other the best and because of the stereotypes thrust upon them in the show dictate that they should be together. They constantly keep track of one another just a bit more fervently than they do with the other team mates.

**Starling/Aerrow** is based on their chemistry on the battlefield, though probably would only ever be an awkward one-sided thing on either of their parts due to the age difference. Still, they're a bit more obvious than Piper and Aerrow, probably because the few scenes we have of them together are very intense and full of action.

**:Piper:**

**Piper and Relationships: **Like Aerrow, Piper has a duty to the ship and to her friends to stick around and is too responsible to go gallivanting around looking for love. She's also unofficial Mother of the group, and has a lot of her plate to deal with. She's strong, so she wouldn't want the complications of romance, but she's also young and often underappreciated, so she would crave the idea of a person who would be there closer than any family member could ever be.

There's not much else I can say for Piper that I haven't said already for Aerrow, due to the fact that she is also constantly mobile and on the go, etc. (From now on assume this same fact for all the other Storm Hawks and Starling.)

**Piper and Sexuality: **We have quite a few possibilities here. We have the typical girl who wants to be rescued by her prince, and we have an independent, stubborn, clever young lady who wants to be in charge and wants someone who appreciates her. Then we have Piper the curious scientist who wouldn't be adverse to fooling around just for the thrill of it. Girls are more likely than boys to consider homosexuality (even if they only ever have homosexual feelings for one other girl in their life) because unlike boys who sometimes subconsciously put a lot of emphasis on sex in relationships, girls are more attuned to emotion and matching personalities. Piper is also a bit disenchanted with boys in general, living with five of them in close quarters, but falls pretty easy for older men ("The Code" and Harrier, "Forbidden City" and Domowitz...). So we have Piper the Heterosexual, who wants either an older man more attuned to her maturity or one of the other Storm Hawks for the companionship and familiarity; Piper the Homosexual who is disenchanted with men altogether; and Piper the bisexual who doesn't judge based on gender, just how well they get along. _Of course there's the highly unlikely Piper the Omnisexual who sleeps around just to prove how tough and independent she is. This last opinion is based entirely of all that sex-filled Piper fanart I see on Deviant Art. LAWWWL._

**The Piper Pairings:**

**Piper/Finn** is based on the opposites attract theory, since they have the most confrontation and friction between them than any other member of the Storm Hawks. Even so, Finn only disagrees with her because of his immaturity, and in the moments when he stops to think rationally he sees it's pointless to argue and even tries to cheer her up when she's down. (Episode six, "Best Friends Forever"). If Finn were able to get over himself and learn the meaning of compromise, I don't see any reason why they couldn't be together. _Shut up, P/A fans. _

**Piper/Cyclonis **is based on the rivalry issue, but in this case they do seem to be real rivals rather than "The minute I see you I want to rip you apart" deal we get with the Dark Ace and Aerrow. Out of all the villain/hero pairings this one is the most oddly feasible- I could actually see it happening, if either one of them were to defect to the other side. Star-crossed lovers, I call it. They don't want to hurt each other. (Well, Cyclonis was pretty mad with Piper by the end of Episode Six _(IF I CAN'T HAVE YOU NO ONE CAN "there's always the alternative_") and we haven't seen any interaction since then, so… until the much-awaited episode 27 I have nothing else to go by).

**Piper/Stork **is based on how sweet she is to him despite his pessimism. He's a tough nut to crack and Piper loves a challenge, and he probably would benefit from learning how to trust people.

**:Finn:**

…bursts out laughing BWAH HAH HAH HAH…

**Finn And Relationships: **Finn, as we've mentioned before, is a normal fourteen year old boy, so he's impaired from thinking of long-term consequences. He does love the ladies, as we've seen, but for someone to love Finn they'd have to be extremely patient, or a rabid fan girl. And while the patient ones probably wouldn't want a headstrong, annoying, obnoxious young man in the first place the fan girls would probably get boring to Finn after a while. I don't see Finn ever finding a stable relationship unless he changes that dangerous attitude of his. _Grow up, Finn fan girls._

**Finn and Sexuality: **He's not shy, we've seen that many times over in the show. And just because he luvs them ladies doesn't mean he's not bi. In fact, a horny kid like Finn is probably the most likely to be bi, but he might keep it a deadly secret. However many Stork/Finn moments you see, though, you have to admit he does seem pretty… straight. Episode three, "Gale Force Winds". He reacts fairly normally to seeing Junko in a bathing suit- "GWAH! Ugh, thanks Piper, I really didn't need to see that." Also in episode three we see a moment when the Dark Ace knocked out Finn's engine and he lands in Junko's arms, their faces very close. They both turn away with mutual faces of "…ew."._ Or, if you're a rabid fan girl of that pairing, I guess you could say it's just one of those anime "-blush blush- I like it but omg how embarrassing!" moments._

So we have Finn the non-sexual in your dreams, Finn the heterosexual for all the ladies he likes, and Finn the homosexual for Junko, Stork, or Aerrow, and Finn the Omnisexual who wants anything that moves. Considering I know fourteen year old boys pretty well, heterosexual is just the most likely option I see here.

**The Finn Pairings.**

**Finn/Ravess: **I've seen some fan fiction for this, here and there. I honestly don't ever see this happening in the show because A) Ravess is a known perfectionist and wouldn't want a sloppy boy when she could have a man who would jump to do her bidding and B) Finn wouldn't want an "old lady" who would yell at him when he could have a rabid Vapos fan girl who worships the ground he walks on. This pairing is based only on the fact that they're both sharpshooters, not on any actual interaction.

**Finn/Dove: **It's based on their interaction in episode three. Lul, Dove has him whipped. I've also seen this, and… well… I guess there's no reason why it can't work. But Dove could be just as easily paired up with Piper or Aerrow, so we can't say we've finally found the OTP of the Storm Hawks universe.

**Finn/Junko: **Is based on how cute they are. They have a special relationship, like Piper and Aerrow, as in they're buddies who'd do anything for each other. (Remember the elephant ants and the scorpion flies from episode five, "Tranquility Now"? And the always-carrying-him-around in episode seven, "The Black Gorge"?) The only problem is that they're most likely… _not_… gay!

**Stork.**

**Stork and Relationships/Sexuality: **Stork doesn't want people touching him, but he doesn't seem adverse to touching other people. Weird, huh? Like I've said before, he's a tough nut to crack. Most of the time he's scared of everything, so whoever wants to be with him needs to be _extremely_ patient, not to mention someone who wouldn't get tired of constantly reassuring him and stroking his fragile ego. Like Finn, if Stork wants a relationship he needs to change, but unlike Finn he seems perfectly happy being alone with the Condor. _Sorry Shalls._

So we have Stork the nonsexual (the most likely by far) because he hates/fears contact; Stork the bisexual who will respond to the first person who manages to look through his utter weirdness; and Stork the Condorsexual who wants nothing more than to remain with his beloved carrier ship.

**The Stork Pairings.**

**Stork/Finn: **Based on repeated intimate gestures on Stork's part, a lot of fan girls simply just want two hot guys to clamor over. Stork might benefit from a fun-loving guy like Finn, and Finn likewise would learn how to calm down a little.

**Stork/_Condor_: **Perhaps the only OTP (one true pairing) of the Storm Hawks universe… Stork would die for the _Condor_.

**Stork/Repton: **_HAWT!! _But inconceivable as a healthy, monogamous relationship. The only unfortunate way this might ever happen is rape. And even then it would only be one sided lust on Repton's part.

**Junko.**

**Junko and Relationships: **By far the second-easiest person to pair an OC up with, after Finn. Yet I can count on one hand all the Junko/OC's out there. People don't like to write about Junko that much because he's "nawt hawt," and far too innocent. _Hell, I have trouble writing him just being him. It's easier to get into the head of a twisted person cause, well, heh, I'm pretty twisted myself. _Or maybe I'm pulling this out of my ass. The thing is, almost nobody has made a Mary Sue for Junko, and I have no idea why. I'll admit it. I don't know why people don't like pairing up Junko with anybody other than Finn. Probably because he's a flat character and not fun to mess around with on ink and paper. Junko however is good boyfriend material, being nice if a little on the shy side, and capable of loving deeply… even if he is thick as a brick.

**Junko and Sexuality: **_Nonexistant. Don't even look for it._

**The Junko Pairings.**

_Besides Finn/Junko, which I've already delved into, there really aren't any Junko pairings. And mind you, I'm only going by what I've read on fan fiction dot net. _

So we have Junko the nonsexual because he's so innocent,_ and Junko the Bundle of Love And Giggles who loves everybody and would only go further with somebody who showed signs of loving him back._

**Starling.**

**Starling and Relationships: **Also nonexistent, but for different reasons. I liken Starling to Batman- she wants love and to move forward, but is dragged back by her numbingly cold, dark past. She needs help, but refuses to let people see her weakened. She's a sad, sad person, and she might be a shell too tough to crack, due to her spirit and strength. The Storm Hawks are trying, but if she refuses even friendship I don't see her accepting companionship anytime soon.

**Starling and Sexuality: **As far as we've seen in the show, she's as straight-laced as you can get _without going batshit insane or turning into a Rex Guardian._

**The Starling Pairings.**

**Starling/Piper** is utterly one-sided hero worship on Piper's part, but Starling might feel for her… a little.

**Starling/Dark Ace **is based… um… on the fact that they're both lone, adult fighters with tough shells to crack. Hey, there's always the chance that they had a fling the brief time she was working undercover in Cyclonia!

_**Starling/Stork **is my own pet fantasy based on maturity levels, similar ages, and the fact that I think they're both oddballs and thusly need the companionship of fellow oddballs. And because My!Starling has a yen for dem green boys._

**Starling/Repton **is forbidden love further wedged apart by rage and betrayal. _See? Luvz her some green boyz….desu desu desu desu._

Next time, the Cyclonians!


	3. Chapter 3

After a long wait, we have... The Cyclonian Pairings! (-epic fanfare plays-). Let's start off with our main wh- main girl that people enjoy pairing up within the Cyclonian ranks. Overtly biased opinions will be in italics.

**Cyclonis.**

**Cyclonis and Relationships:** Needless to say, Cyclonis has more than a few screws loose. She's also the dictator of an entire empire and only fourteen years old. This is not a good combination for romance of any sort. But, if we're to look at her as a human rather than an untouchable, mad empress (_even though that's what she IS_) we can see a soul that craves contact and understanding. Perhaps no one could have put it better than Piper in episode six- "a lonely girl who desperately wants a friend". But as with the aspect of her personality that is a heartless woman, so we must not also solely focus on the lonely little girl. When you mold the two together you get Cyclonis, torn between what I assume to be familial responsibility of assuring her father's conquest over the Atmos and her own desires to be normal. She also might possibly be schizophrenic, what with the ghostly undertone that afflicts her voice every now and then. But since this show has had several fantasy elements to it, she might actually be possessed by the ghost of her dead father! This sets us up for a _cliché _episode (_Storm Hawks love clichés_) where she must fight herself and what she wants versus her father and what he wants and sacrifices herself to save the Storm Hawks because she's finally seen the light.

Either way, as she is in the episodes already aired, a relationship with Cyclonis would be impossible. She's simply too busy, and too demanding, and too damn evil (let's be honest here, folks.). She's also only fourteen, or even thirteen, so the idea of an entirely sexual relationship with no emotional connection might be a little far fetched. Then again, she's remarkably mature for her age and might... welcome certain advances out of sheer curiosity, or perhaps as another medium to establish her dominance over someone.

**Cyclonis and Sexuality**: Everyone- and I mean _everyone_- is or has been in an uproar over the infamous episodes 6 and 27. They declare that Cyclonis is a lesbian or that Cyclonis is straight, but either way they get all up in arms about it. As far as I've seen, anyway. _Just for the heck of it, let's count all the fun moments, shall we? Holding Piper's hand (to save her life)? Check. Arms around Piper's waist? Check. All that weird sexual tension in the room when they were alone and giggly and wouldn't look each other in the eye (i.e., glancing at the floor or forward when their eyes met)? Check. Going into a rage and trying to kill Piper when Piper refused her? Check. Licking cake/cream/godknowswhat off of Piper's cheek? Check. Holding Piper separate from the rest of the Storm Hawks to kill all of them and not her (even if it was under the excuse that she was going to kill Piper last as a sort of treat)? Check. STRADDLING Piper and pinning her down to the floor? Legs around Piper's neck? All tangled up in Piper? Physically wrestling with Piper? Piper Piper Piper? Obsessed with Piper? Maybe? Check, baby. Check._

Hmm..

Well whatever you believe, Cyclonis is deranged and evil either way so she's not likely to qualm at the idea of doing something forbidden or taboo. She _is_ forbidden and taboo (and jailbait, but let's not get into that). _She's all over that like white on rice._ So if Cyclonis were to decide one day that she was going to make Piper hers, completely and utterly, she would _be more likely to be confused on whether to use the whips or the whipped cream rather than being confused as to what defines her sexuality._

So we have Cyclonis the nonsexual, because she is evil (and prepubescent) and concerned with nothing but the spread of her empire. We have Cyclonis the lonely girl, who sees in Piper an end to her loneliness (but is not necessarily a lesbian, instead simply craving companionship and besides, we haven't seen any "moments" between her and anyone except Piper). We have Cyclonis the heterosexual who is actually just a misunderstood girl under all the weirdness and has a shot at love with a prince from a far off terra or maybe one of her subordinates, like Repton or the Dark Ace.

**The Cyclonis Pairings.**

**Piper/Cyclonis: **I've already discussed it but I'll discuss it again. My personal pet pairing because it breaks free from Storm Hawk's clichés. I've already gone pretty much into detail about how they want each other, but would it actually ever work? Only if Cyclonis were to change her face again and decide to join the Storm Hawks against the encroaching Cyclonian empire (perhaps after losing all her powers because her ghostly possessor is gone and now ruling in her stead). Or, opposite to that, if Piper were to decide that power is her goal and she wants to rule at Cyclonis' side.

**Dark Ace/Cyclonis: **The other popular Cykie (read: Psyche) pairing is the burly soldier-man and his master. The Dark Ace is loyal to her above all others and we can't help but wonder why, or wonder if perhaps something else could grow out of that. Both the main appeal and the repulse of the pairing is the age difference, you either hate it or love it.

**Aerrow/Cyclonis: **No basis whatsoever, as they have very little interaction within the show. Perhaps if we hadn't already seen her obsession with Piper we might think she could want Aerrow to join their side, but… _Yeah, this is just for people who enjoy pairing villains with good guys but don't like teh gay._

**The Dark Ace.**

**The Dark Ace and Relationships: **Much like Cyclonis, he's too damn evil to ever really love anybody. The only thing that drives him is serving Master Cyclonis and killing Aerrow. He isn't a normal person who wants stability and safety. He does what his master tells him to, period. That's why that pairing is so popular, since he hasn't shown any real interaction with any other girl except her.

**The Dark Ace and Sexuality: **Anything goes here. Seriously. So far we've had no solid clues as to what his sexuality might be. He's an adult, and male, so he's likely already past his "experimental" days if such days ever existed for him. Whatever he is, he is. He's probably not open to trying anything new, either. Take that as you will. So we have the Dark Ace the nonsexual, who has killed his human side so as to better serve Cyclonis, The Dark Ace the heterosexual who's just a man in Cyclonis's service, and The Dark Ace the homosexual who's just a man in Cyclonis's service. _Or Dark Ace the omnisexual who sees sex as another form of conquest!_

**The Dark Ace Pairings.**

**Ravess/Dark Ace: **A pretty popular pairing because it makes sense. They don't seem to hate each other and she's also the only eligible female (besides Cyclonis) within the Talons. Conceivable within the show because it's less controversial than DA/MC, what with the age difference and all. _Parents would think it's sending a message to children everywhere that statutory rape is ok.._

**Piper/Dark Ace: **Ooh, the betrayal! "Acer" is popular because, like MC/DA it has the appeal of older man/ younger girl. Since a lot of fan fiction writers are young girls, they might use Piper as wish fulfillment since Piper is more normal than Cyclonis is and they can see themselves in her. It's also popular for people who are tired of A/P and want something a little more edgy, but not quite as dark as MC/DA (which can get down right kinky in the worst of cases). Acer is a nice middle ground between the fluff and the danger, but would not work in the show. Like, ever. They share zero dialogue except for episode four with the Phoenix. (Piper: "Don't give it to me!" _Ahahha… out of context_…)

**Already covered Da/Ae and I don't feel like covering it again. Nyah. :P**

**Snipe.**

**Snipe And Relationships: **Well, as we've already said Snipe is a pretty flat character. Also in previous episodes we've seen that he does not like "the mush**y **stuff" (Episode "InFinnity"). Snipe's only goal and purpose in life seems to remain smashing things. _And yet the rabid fan girl still sees pairings for him? It's true, he could be gay. I mean, he looks like he's wearing a corset under that thing. Maybe he's too dumb to realize it._

**Snipe and Sexuality: **_Er… Well… God, this is weird. _He's probably straight. We've just seen no evidence either way. _So we have Snipe the hetero who buys hookers cause no one in their right mind would date him (not that he wants dates). Or Snipe the homo who hides in the closet cause it's not manly to be gay. Duh. _Or Snipe the nonsexual who just smashes things.

**The Snipe Pairings:**

_Someone suggested Suzi-Lu/Snipe. Seriously. What the hell. I'm all for crack pairings but there's crack and then there's **crack**. They have zero on-screen interaction. They're different species- which isn't that bad for Storm Hawks pairings (Pork anyone?) but Snipe himself would probably look at her as an animal. Suzi-Lu hates Talons. Snipe hates Sky Knights. Neither of them are really accepting of change or being too open-minded (Suzi-Lu a little more, but she still holds to her ways and Snipe is too dumb). It's just, no. No._

**Ravess/Snipe: **_Incest, only not hot. Really. Who else could love Snipe but his psycho sister?_

_This is getting boring. I don't want to write about Ravess, man, she's just as boring as Snipe._

**Ravess (_Damnit_).**

**Ravess And Relationships: **As evidenced by the show, Ravess is a volatile woman. _Though which stereotypical bad guy isn't? _She often bullies, threatens, or otherwise is just plain nasty to her Talons for no real reason at all (Stratosphere almost throwing someone into space, Storm Warning throwing a deadly weapon (twice) at the unfortunate Talon, and both of them for trivial matters).

**Ravess and Sexuality: **Ravess uses her sexuality like a hammer, smacking you with it with every thrust of her hips in that swaggering catwalk-esque gait of hers. It could go two ways- _I am sexy and you will never ever have me_, or _I am sexy and you might have me if you play your cards right/ If I'm bored._

We've seen no evidence either way for her being straight or homosexual.

The Ravess Pairings:

Already covered all the major ones.

Crack.

OK this is boring.

**THE END.**

What's up next? Alternate Universes!


	4. Chapter 4

This is where I officially abandon trying to be all professional with this.

The second season brings us new information on characters that have had very little screen time. I'll keep this short and sweet.

I'm beginning to think all the Cyclonians are legally insane. This is not how I want my bad guys to act, god damn it!

**The Nightcrawlers:** Thank you Nerd Corps, for keeping them from saying "Whatever" "buzz off" "scram" and "cool". Even if they are limited to "yes master"... good bad guys don't need long monologues!

**Commander Chicken Feather**: Is rapidly becoming my favorite Cyclonian. Yes, even more so than the master!

**Ravess:** I retract my earlier statements of her. That was just me imposing my fanon on her I suppose. She's a complete psycho, delusional, and I find her character easier to swallow when I imagine she's only a year or two older than Cyclonis, which would explain her bouts of Finn-y behavior. I mean come on. I can't be the only one who made that comparison after seeing her go power mad in "Power Grab"! She still remains my least favorite character, but I also feel a strange sort of pity for her. The writers really don't do her justice.

**Snipe**: I think I love him now- again, only if I imagine him as being the same age of the Storm Hawks. Also, I'm glad to know he's her younger brother. I'm not sure if that's a well known fact but I've always believed it to be true. He's just so lovably retarded I couldn't help but giggle. OH AND HE HAS LITTLE TOY ANIMAL FRIENDS TOO LIKE JUNKO DOES.

**The Dark Ace:** ....Yep, nothing about him has changed.

**Cyclonis... God, I would let that girl do horrible things to me**: Is a little more "raaawrr" than usual, changing from the emotionally varied character we knew and loved into a shallow, one-dimensional overlord. "Five Days" gave us hope for some serious development, and then everything after that shattered it. Way to go, Nerd Corps. :(

**The Colonel:** I knew he'd come back. I knew he would have a small pet. I knew he would help the Storm Hawks in some way. My opinion of him stands: He is an awesome gangster and I want to see him throw a tea party for Cyclonis.

**Repton:** My opinion still stands, only now I must add that I would hit that. I would hit that like the fist of an angry god.

**Spitz**: I originally was going to write a short ficlet about Repton discovering himself (or something mushy like that) after Spitz pressured Hoerk into rebelling and killing Leugey. I'm glad to find that my initial feeling of him being a sneaky traitor type proved accurate. This sort of contradicted my idea that Repton could take all three single handedly (he does, by the way) but it was still a fun idea.

**Stork**: I ship him and Junko now. Just because of "A Colonel of Truth". Don't ask me to explain it. I just like it. (Stork tops. While wearing the dress.)

**Lightning Strike.** Is his name seriously Lightning Strike. WHAT THE FUCK, NERD CORPS. At least now we (maybe?) know Aerrow's last name now. Aerrow Strike. Hmmm... Has a nice ring to it.

**Arygyn:** Is not alone! More Skeelurs appeared, giving me an instant dosage of Fanfiction rabies. They were all dudes, too. WAIT NO BAD THOUGHTS BAD THOUGHTS.

So yeah, here ends my pretentious ranting.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** I know she doesn't have a throne. It's official, there is no throne. She got rid of it when her grandmother died. Oh, and his name is Xekstrin, of course. ;)

**OoOoOo**

With a single sharp word, they were dismissed. Snipe and Raves gave each other confused looks before turning their backs on the master and marching out as quickly as they could. It was sudden, her mood swing- one second she was listening to them, attentive to their reports, when her whole visage seemed to shift. She bristled, sat up straight, and told them through clenched teeth to leave, _now_.

Far be it in their nature to disobey direct orders.

It might just have saved their life.

Cyclonis sat in her throne, trembling from head to foot- not from fear, no, she was not afraid. Perhaps it would have been wise to have a certain amount of fear right now, but she couldn't bring herself to do so. Something deep inside her knew there was no room for fear in this encounter, that the very fabric of her soul was at stake, and that fear would be her undoing.

She relaxed just barely, sinking back into her seat to stare out into the gathering darkness of her throne room.

She understood.

Somehow, she understood.

And she was ready for whatever might happen next.

The darkness twitched, black velvet, pulsing and shifting, yet still she sat and observed, as though the room wasn't filled with danger. She knew there was nowhere to run- how could you run from shadows? Her whole stronghold was filled with shadows. The very cast of light against her _eyelashes_ caused shadows. They were everywhere, she realized, and they were there to kill her.

But Cyclonis waited for them, as they crept closer, as yellow eyes formed from the gloom to stare endlessly into hers, and she could see inside them as surely as she could see inside the clear facets of a crystal. It was a simple matter, after realizing this, to then exert her will upon the creatures. They obeyed her because she was strong- they obeyed her because her heart was also filled with a darkness like theirs. They backed away, quivering in obedience, antennae waving and small voices chittering like the whispers of madness until she snapped, "Be silent!" and they were.

She settled back into her throne again, considerably more relaxed now that the first trial was over, and then tried to make sense of the creatures before her. There was applause- from the corner of the room. Just like the creatures, the hooded man appeared from darkness as though he was born from the stuff as a true man is born from a woman. Cyclonis reached for her staff, feeling the shift in the balance of power as surely as she had sensed the creatures in the first place. Confusion and distortion ran amuck- Cyclonis was untested, there was no telling who of their two masters was strongest.

"Who are you?" Cyclonis demanded, staff in hand, standing tall and proud.

"A friend," replied the voice. He gestured to the creatures. "Bearing gifts."

The creatures swelled around Cyclonis, crashing around her in waves, yet none of them actually touching her. Perhaps something inside them felt fear as well.

"I sent them here to test the strength of your heart. I must say I wasn't disappointed- even now, they'd love nothing more than to kill you for the same reason they are under your complete control."

Cyclonis glanced over at them, the one closest to her side. It looked up at her with vacant eyes- almost cute, if they didn't instantly provoke loathing in all who saw them. "...Oh, really, now?"

One of the creatures bounced up to the man's open palm, and he stroked its head before squeezing tightly with both hands around its vaguely humanoid shape, making it scream and wriggle in his grip. He simply applied more pressure, pulling higher sounding screams from the thing until it _popped_, vanishing into smoke, leaving glowing golden orbs behind in its wake. Cyclonis saw now that the hooded man had fake red enameled claws with swirling gold accents on his fingers, the ones on his thumbs being particularly long, sharp, and cruel. He stepped through the remains of the creature, walking towards her while pulling off the finger claws like one might casually peel off gloves before heading towards the dinner table. He stopped, just before

Remaining still as he explained everything to her, Cyclonis tried not to show how she inhaled everything he said like a starving woman at a buffet. He spoke to her, explaining the doorways between the worlds- doorways! A thrill of excitement ran through her. All this time, all the legends she had read as a child (well, a _smaller_ child) were in fact true. Sitting at her grandmother's knee, wishing for a way to escape the inevitable- here it was.

Finally.

Doorways between the worlds. Tunnels of darkness. Ships that pressed through time and space and matter. Weapons of strange, mystical power- only they weren't exactly as exotic as one might believe. Each world was to be slowly overrun, with the help and aid of a powerful person already living there, one with ambition enough to cover the world in darkness. Cyclonis he had said, was this person.

"However, you must be wary. Three interceptors will soon appear, and upon seeing this world in darkness will attempt to-"

"Interceptors?" Cyclonis said, quickly jumping to strange conclusions.

The strange hooded man corrected himself. "Intruders. Invaders. Interdimensional travelers like myself."

"Let me guess," Cyclonis said. "_Children_."

He laughed in a way she was familiar with. Adults were always amused at the way she spoke of those her own age- as something despicable. Something revolting. Something she was not. "One of them. There are three. And they will try to stop you."

So here it was. A sudden puncture in the balloon that had been building inside her. Sullen, angry, betrayed, she glanced away from the man and said, "Allow me to make another educated guess. These three will go to those who oppose me and gain their succor as well, no?"

Either not knowing what she was driving at or a superb actor, he seemed unconcerned with her sudden mood swing. "It's only logical. Is there a problem?"

Laughing, Cyclonis stood and, foot by foot, made her slow way down the three steps that separated her from her high dais to where the man was standing. She spoke as she descended. "You think I can't spot a con man when I see one, Interceptor?" she demanded.

"I assure you, madam-"

"Speak not your lies," she snapped. "I can see through this whole charade. Due to the..." she glanced around her, eyes narrowing at the creatures. "Nature of this operation, I can already tell how everything will end. I will win- or the three interlopers will win- and none of it will matter, will it?"

The man in the hood kept his silence.

There was a twist of her hands, and a small coin was pulled from thin air. "Tell me," she said, turning the coin this way and that, looking at both sides with interest. "How many years have you been doing this? If you can measure your time by years, that is. How many worlds have you touched, taken, and then left? How many worlds fought back, resisted, and won?"

She flipped the coin. It made a shining silver arc, clattered, and landed far away from them. "What," she said, "Side did it land on?"

The man in the hood went to check, leaning over the coin in the gloom and answering, "Heads."

"Was it what you guessed?"

"I didn't guess."

"Because you know better than to risk everything on fifty-fifty odds," she said. She turned her back on the man. "This is a child's war, and one I will take no part in. Because this-" she gestured to the Heartless around her- "This will never end. You can't win when it's a matter of light and darkness. You might as well wage war against the clouds and the mountains."

When she had turned around again, he was gone. So were the Heartless.

He knew he didn't have a new disciple here. She probably intimidated him. If he could feel intimidation- in hindsight, there was something distinctly inhuman about the hooded man. Unsettled, she sat back down on her throne, wondering if he would go to someone else now. Who, and why, and how would they react? The only person anywhere near her level of influence and power was The Colonel, and he wasn't likely to reach the same (correct) conclusion she had. Pondering the first words the hooded man had said to her, she wondered if Colonel's heart was "strong enough" to withstand that first assault by the Heartless.

On the other side were the Atmosians- was there corruption in the Council? Most likely. But was there darkness there? _True_ darkness? The kind she felt when she brushed her fingertips over the pulse in her chest?

Maybe she had made a mistake.

**OoOoOo**

No one knows when he arrived, or how he arrived, or who or what he was, but they all felt pretty certain that after the first week there was nothing the Moogle wanted more than to sell them stuff. He set up shop dead smack in the center of town square and sold them everything they could ever need. His supplier was mysterious, another moogle just like him, but dressed in a black hooded coat.

Still. How could something as cute as him mean something bad was coming?

_-Fin_


End file.
